The Forging Page 29

  John stood and without comment gave his daughter and granddaughter each a kiss on their foreheads then walked to the front door. Opening the door for him, I offered my hand, and we shook. “Nathan, I am going home to pick up a few things along with my Greener. I’ll be back in a jiffy.”

  “John, I thank you for the offer, but he is not coming here for some time. He is going to let us stew for a while more.” Whispering, I said, “His killing of Mrs. Galos, his mother, is a message to me.” A brief look of mild surprise flashed on John’s face. “Mrs. Galos and I talked. I begged her to ask for mercy from her son. I learned you cannot ask for mercy from a monster. All you can do is kill it. He and I are tied together. Don’t ask me how I know, but I will know when he will come for us. Now is the time I must prepare for my own private little war. What I am going to do? I don’t know yet, but I may need you. I will call upon you when I am ready.”

  John looked down for a moment then reached up and patted the door frame and said to the house “Guard well my family,” he turned his head and looked deep into my eyes, “each and every member of my family,” he walked out to his car. I watched as he drove away.

  I closed and locked, the front door. It is secure. I made my rounds checking to see all the doors and windows are shut tight and locked. Charlene had already put Moiraine to bed. Quietly I opened my daughter’s door and leaned my head into her room to double-check on her.

  She sat up in bed and said, “Daddy, the man on the TV. He is the one who hurt mommy, isn’t he?”

  “Yes.”

  “Is he coming back?”

  “Yes, but not tonight.”

  “Can I sleep with the guys?”

  “Of course, you can.” Her cuddling toys are in their corner, so I gathered them up and placed them in her bed. “Goodnight, Honey.”

  As I started to step out of the room and close the door, Moiraine asked, “Can you leave the door open and light on?” Nodding, I did as she asked. I walked back to the living room and sat down in the recliner there in the dark. After a moment, Blossom was thumping her tail against the chair. I lifted her onto my lap and mindlessly petted her as I sat there.

  After a time, the light came on, and Charlene was staring at me. “Are you coming to bed?” She is dressed in what are her most unflattering nightclothes. I sat there looking at her. “Come to bed. There is nothing you can do tonight.”

  “Helpless, I am so helpless. He kicked my ass at the corner and shot you. I don’t think I can stop him when he comes for us here.” My head hung low with my confession. The electric touch of my wife on my chin brought me to the now. She lifted my head, so I am looking in her eyes.

  “This burden is more than anyone can handle. The whole city is after him now. The police will catch him. Just wait and see. Someone will call in a tip and bam. They will lock him up fast, and he will never be free again.” She took my hands and pulled me up to my feet. She put her arms around me. My arms wrapped around her. “Gently,” is all she said.

  My arms held her as tenderly as I could. It is as gently as when I held Moiraine for the first time. I love my family. When this all started, I thought the greatest duty a man could fulfill is to die for his family. I was wrong. The greatest duty a man can fulfill for his family is to… kill.

  Charlene released the embrace and said “Let’s go to bed. I am exhausted, and you look dead on your feet.” Still holding one of my hands, she led me to our bed and rest.

  Looking up at the ceiling in the dark, I pondered what I must do. I drifted off.

  Moiraine’s screamed, “Mommy, Mommy!” I dashed to her as fast as I could with Char only half a moment behind me. I saw my daughter thrashing in bed. My daughter is still asleep and screaming, “Mommy, wake up! Please wake up. Daddy, why are you putting your hand inside, mommy? Wake up, Mommy!”

  I grabbed up my daughter and started rocking her in my arms. “Moiraine, it’s only a dream.” She is soaking wet. Strands of her hair are matted against her face. Her pajamas felt like she had taken a shower in them. Her eyes are wide open, and the pupils dilated. “Wake up, Honey. See, your mommy is fine. Look.”

  A look of surprise found her face, and she reached out. “Mommy. Mommy.” Charlene grabbed up her daughter to comfort her. Char rocked Moiraine and quieting her down with tender cooing.

  It took maybe half an hour to settle Mo back down to normal. Char cleaned her up and in fresh jammies while I changed the sheets on her bed. During this time Moiraine kept a death grip on the teddy bear. The damn news flash brought on a night terror to her sleep. It is all too much for her little mind to handle.

  The next three nights were a repeat of this scene. Moiraine would go to sleep, and all would seem okay, but she would have a night terror. Her mood grew darker every day. My lovely child was replaced by a fearful girl who had no power to call her own. What can I do? I won’t stand by idly and watch her sanity slip away.

  On the fourth night before Char and I went to sleep, I said, “We need to talk about Moiraine’s dreams. Watching her night after night going through this is breaking my heart.”

  Char turned to me and said, “I will take her to the doctor’s tomorrow. Maybe there is something they can do.”

  “It’s a fine idea, but I want to do something for her tonight. I want your blessing before I try it.”

  “What do you want to do?”

  Mustering my courage, I said, “You said when you were in the coma you dreamed of me visiting you and us talking.”

  “Yes.”

  “The truth of the matter is I did visit you in your dreams.” I sat up in bed and looked away from my wife.

  “Nathan, of course, you visited me in your dreams. You were under stress it gave you some comfort to dream of me just as I got comfort from dreaming of you.”

  “No, you don’t understand. The first time I visited you was when you were just out of surgery. Somehow, I floated up from my body and heard your voice. We looked at our bodies. Yours was in a bed with all kinds of gizmos attached. Mine was resting my head on my hands. We visited another time, and you cried as I left.” Looking at her, I saw her face contorting with more emotions than I cared to count. Finally, she chose only one. Disbelief won the day. “I know it sounds nuts, but it’s true.”

  “Nathan, this is crazy talk. People don’t go traveling for real in their dreams.”

  “You said, ‘Nathan, not so loud people are sleeping.’ Next, you said, ‘Nathan, I’m scared. I’ve tried to wake-up. Nothing I do seems to help. What’s wrong? Why can’t I wake-up?’ I explained to you the doctor said you were dying. At the time, I believed I was only dreaming too. It pained me to see a phantom of you, so I left. You began crying and said, ‘Nathan, don’t leave me alone.’ My heart was hurting so bad, and I wanted my visits to be real. I rushed to the hospital with Moiraine in my arms, and you were crying. I saw tears running down your face.” Charlene put a hand of comfort on my shoulder. “Char, those visits were real. I traveled in the realm of dreams.”

  She said, “I thought those were only dreams too, but everything you said I remember. I was so hurt and mad when you left me. I tried to wake up. I tried so hard, Nathan. It felt like something was pulling me the other way. I even saw my mother. I thought I was going to die.” She started to cry. “I think I almost did.” Gently I held my wife as she cried on my shoulder.

  Whispering in her ear, I said, “But you didn’t die. You came back to us. You came back to us.”

  Charlene pulled away and grabbed a tissue from the box she keeps on her nightstand. She wiped away the tears. With a look of determination, “What is your plan?”

  “To visit Mo in her dreams. I will try to distract her with some silliness and hope she gets a restful sleep. I think it may break the cycle of terror in her dreams. Have I told you I love you? Here I tell you something I have a hard time believing and you take it all in stride.” Tenderly, I kissed my wife.

  When we were done with the kiss, Char said, “Sounds like a plan. What do you w
ant me to do?”

  “What I want you to do the doctor hasn’t cleared you for yet,” I said as I gave her a lustful smile.

  “Get your mind out of the gutter.”

  “We’ve never done it in a gutter, but if you want to, I’m game.”

  “Nathan, let’s keep our attention on our intention please.”

  I replied, “Yes, dear,” but I kept the lustful smile on my face. “Seriously, be prepared to comfort Mo if this doesn’t work. Alright, let’s do it.” The lights were turned off, and I laid down.

  Sleep wasn’t coming. Breathing in deep and let it out slowly usually helps. Nope. Commanding my body to relax, addressing each part in turn, was of no use. My thoughts are all over the place. “Calm.” I thought. It is as if I had no weight. My dream-body floated up from my real-body. Charlene is watching me closely. She looked worried. I wish I could tell her I am here. It dawned on me the first time I did this with her in the room, she heard me. With my will, I communicated, “I am here. I will pull Mo out of her sleep now. Give me a thumbs up if you hear me.”

  Char said, “I’ll give you a different finger if you don’t stop playing around. Now see to our daughter.”

  I can talk to the wakeful while in this dream world. “Cool.”

  At Moiraine’s bedside, “Mo, we need to talk.” My little baby lifted up and was before me all translucent and floaty. Pointing to her body, “Look Moiraine.” She gave a little giggle.

  “Daddy, why am I out here if I am asleep in my bed?”

  “It’s like a dream, Honey.”

  “Awesome!” she giggled again. “What now?”

  Children are so accepting of new things. If I did this to her grandpa, he would argue half the night away about how you can’t do this. “Moiraine, let’s play a trick on your mom.” Moiraine nodded her head yes and started tiptoeing into the master bedroom. Tiptoeing also, I followed. “Okay, I want you to say something to your mother.”

  Moiraine said, “Boo.” Her mother didn’t respond. I motioned for her to try again, but this time, I tried to will it to work. “Boo.” Charlene jumped, and at first, her face flashed a little anger, then she smiled.

  “You did it, Mo!”

  “This is fun, Daddy,” came from my daughter. “Can we go scare someone else? Oh, let’s go scare Grandpa.”

  “Your grandpa has seen enough ghosts lately. I don’t think he wants to hear them too.”

  Mo gave her shoulders a shrug. “Okay.” Then a grin grew on Mo’s face. “TAG! You’re it.” Moiraine touched me and ran out of the room. In a flash, I was chasing her. I am faster, but she is a nimble little goblin. We ran around the house. This is something Charlene never lets us do. We are so naughty. I tried to tag Mo back, but she ducked under the dining room table. I would go right, and she would go left. We did that back and forth three times with her laughing the whole time.

  An idea struck me like a bolt of lightning. Crack! “This is only a dream.” I reached through the table, passing right through it, and tagged her.

  “No fair! No fair!” She crawled out from under the table. “This is fun! Mommy never lets me run around inside. Will we get in trouble?”

  “Not if we don’t tell her.” Moiraine giggled. Then a pained look took her.

  “Daddy, I don’t feel well. It feels like…” She is being pulled away from me like someone has a rope tied around her waist and is pulling fast. She reached out to me. She grabbed a hold of my hand, but I couldn’t stop her. We both were dragged straight like a shot through the wall and into her room. She fell into her body, and I was pulled in with her.

  We are back at the corner by Greentree Elementary. Maybe I am experiencing her dream somehow. Everything looked so large. All the adults are as giants. This must be what it is to see it all from her perspective. She is walking toward my dream-doppelganger all smiles. Mark Galos started to approach. He looked no different than any other parent there to pick up their child. My alter ego is talking to Mark, but as the conversation went on, Mark became larger and more menacing. My dream-self became smaller and looked to be cowering. Moiraine called out, and Mark pulled the revolver and started turning toward my wife and child. His face is twisted and distorted. He looks like the monster I know him to be. His eyes are bulging and red. His hair writhed like Medusa’s hair does when she’s pissed. His mouth extended ear to ear, and his teeth are glissading white needles dripping with saliva. Mini-me jumped on his gun as he swung his arm around. A shot fired as it had in the real world. Charlene crumpled to the ground. The wailing of Moiraine’s voice is deafening. There is blood, a brilliant red, everywhere. It is spreading in all directions until it covered the entire landscape in crimson sorrow.

  The monstrous Mark ran away laughing as he did. My dream-self had grown to a more normal size and had made its way to Charlene. The figment of me yelled at Moiraine to look away. It is harsh and uncaring. This is killing me seeing Moiraine’s view of the events. She is a child and doesn’t understand I did what I did to try and save her mother. My visage began to grow hideous. My hand, my right hand, became distorted into some cruel hook as it plunged into Charlene’s chest. Oh God, I could hardly bear to see it. My daughter is seeing me as another monster who hurt her mother.

  “Focus, I must focus.” Getting caught up in Moiraine’s dream is not helping her. Taking up a place next to her, I said in a calm voice, “Moiraine, this is but a dream. You have the power to end it.” She is howling in her agony. With a little more force behind it, I said, “Moiraine, this is your father. Look at me.”. It was no good; she is too embroiled in her terror. Here goes. Maybe I can alter this vision as if it is my dream. It is worth a shot. The scene flickered to the moment in our lives when we were throwing the cranes up in the air at my wife’s bedside. It was only a moment, but it broke her torture.

  Mo looked around, then directly at me and said, “Daddy?” The scene flickered back to the corner and somehow grew in terror. Again, I tried to impose my vision on her dream. This time we are on the carousel at Balboa Park. We are all riding around and laughing. In this dream, I had Moiraine reach out and catch the brass ring. She laughed and was so proud. The nightmare returned, and this time, it is an even darker beast. “Daddy, why are you hurting mommy?”

  “Mo, listen to me this is a dream. You are in control. Take control. Change the dream. Use your mind. You KNOW I would never hurt your mommy.”

  For a moment, my words caught her attention. “Daddy?”

  With a sliver of my will into the words, I said, “Think, Mo. See your favorite memory in your mind.” Maybe my willpower will have some influence over her actions. For an instant, we are walking down to school. The next moment all of us are walking hand in hand from school back home. Next, she is helping her mother cook dinner. Each memory flashed faster and faster. My consciousness couldn’t keep up. It is coming at me like a movie montage. It dawned on me all her memories are happy ones. Up until this tragedy, she had no bad memories, only happy ones. In her life, she has been angry, disappointed, and frustrated, but never unhappy. She needs to remember the truth, and she needs to face the terror. Through the storm of memories, I yelled, “Moiraine! take us back to when mommy got hurt.”

  “No! I don’t want to. I’m scared.”

  “It is only a dream. Remember, mommy is all better now. This bad man can’t hurt you or mommy here in YOUR dream.”

  She started crying, “I don’t want to.”

  “Do it, or I will punish you!” Saying those words tore at my heart.

  She cried out, “Mommy.” The scene changed to the corner again. Everything is playing out as before. When she saw the monstrous version of Mark Galos with all those teeth, she cried out again, “Mommy.”

  “Mo, he is not a monster. He is a man. See him as he truly is. Remember, he looked sick. Mark’s image began to flicker back and forth from monster to man. “Good, Moiraine. Keep him as a man here in your dream.” He became only the man. Mr. Galos began to swing the gun around. I willed my dream-sel
f to call out “Moiraine, help me fight this man who wants to hurt your mommy.” She shook her head no at first, then anger and determination took over. She charged into the furball between Mark and me. She threw punches. She made kicks. She even jumped on his back and bit his ear. He howled right good as she did it. At the end of our epic struggle, Mark went running, but it is Mo and me who did the laughing. I gave Mo a high five. Our work here is done. We had the tools. We had the talent. It’s Miller time.

  “Daddy, did you see? I kicked him in his funny part.” Mo laughed hard and long. “What do you want to do now?”

  “You should go back to sleep now. It is time for me to return to my own body and my dreams.” After I finished the statement, I was standing by my bed. I stepped back into my body and woke up. As Charlene walked into the bedroom, I sat up and asked, “Where did you go?”

  “Moiraine was crying out for me, so I went to her bedside.” Charlene looked troubled. “There were a couple of times where I wanted to wake her up. I felt helpless. She is sleeping peacefully for now.” She turned out the light and climbed into bed. “What you tried worked. Do you think you helped her?” Char broke down. Through her crying, she said, “This is all so strange. What’s happening to our family?”

  Gently I held my wife and whispered, “First, yes, I think I did help her. Showing her it is her dream, and she could control it. It gave her power. Second, I don’t know. Before the monster came into our lives, I thought I had a bead on life. Now it is all craziness. There is a lot of craziness I have not told you. You need to hear what I say and not judge me.”

  Charlene gently pushed away from me and wiped her eyes. “Nathan, I have never judged you.”

  “You have judged me twelve ways to Sunday.”

  “I have not,” she said a little indignantly.

  “Shall I name the dates and times?” Gazing at her in the dark I gave her an expression of come on now.